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| Wait for it... waaaaait for it. |
However, here I am doing anything but working on those freebies. Though I did manage to at least put them in some semblance of acceptability before my relapse.
I'm trying to work through how I've been feeling. I think it's got a lot do to with my future fast approaching. I've been in the Army 8 years. That's 8 years of a routine. 8 years of paychecks for showing up to work.
I'm a bit aggravated at myself and the Army. I never really tried to make much of my military "career." Probably because I always knew it wasn't permanent. After I reenlisted, I considered going for promotion again. Though, I was happy. I was crewing Blackhawk helicopters at Ft. Lewis, living in Seattle and making enough money to pay the bills and enjoy my off time. So I just went with it.
The flip side of that coin is simply a whole debate on the flaws of the army promotion system. I've decided to leave it at that.
This leads to my realization that it's all about to end. On the plus side. I'm going back to Seattle and I'm going to be with my wife. I'm also headed into a great uncertainty that kinda scares the hell out of me.
I'm going back to school. Assuming the Post 9-11 GI Bill doesn't take a sudden turn for the worse. I've looked at various jobs to fill in, if I don't go straight back to school. I found that I'm worried in part about going to school, because I have a (psychological) need to maintain my support for my family. It will be an ugly pay cut. Granted, I'll be nearly debt free at that point.
I guess that's enough of a ramble about myself. Maybe all of this unease and tension will make for an awesome album in 2012. One can but hope. I don't even want to think about what to do with a hard drive full of partially completed songs. Songs, that I'd like to finish at some point as well as writing new material.
Mistrust and manual labor,
-Anthony
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